was home kinda late, mother off-ed modem, so didnt update..
work in the day was nothing to mention about.. just purely-bored.. left the shop early, headed ehub, met dumb for movie- The Coffin.. was kinda tempted by this movie when i just knew it received good verdicts in thailand.. so yupsx, watched it.. havent been watching movie in the cinema, since... hmnx.. the last one i caught in cinema was The Mummy 3 with sam and steph.. haha! that was so so long can?! booo.. oh, it was 3 months, exactly.. =.=
blah, so anyway.. the movie isnt that nice actually.. haha! just a few scary scenes, and then i dont really understand le. haha! i only rememeber we kept saying "this guy 赚到了/ that girl 赚到了.." haha.. blah~
finished at 11pm, didnt want to go home.. so headed his, and stayed there for some time..
31/10/08 friday
mammy got to go for doctor appointment, so i went suntec to open the shop myself 1st.. super bored, nearly fell asleep.. then she came at near 2pm, went carrefour there buy food for her, got myself a shihlin XXL chicken chop as well.. ^^ suddenly received a surprise sms from Jaclyn.. she was at that area, and so she asked me where i working at.. haha! so surprised, like near 2 years never saw her le.. =)) so went to meet her after putting down the things at the shop, and we 133-ed to bugis together..
chatted quite a bit.. haha reached bugis, she got her yam ice blend at Sweettalk.. then she headed to parkway while i went to the shop le. haha ^^ hey girl, nice seeing you again! get your degree soon~ good luck! =D
then moody moody moody again.. havent been feeling good these days.. didnt talk much to daddy during work.. kept quiet when my mother scolds and nags, unlike the way i was, talking back to her.. i didnt utter a word since after work.. oh wait, i did.. i said 'anything (随便)' when she asked me what i wanna eat for dinner.. i always wanted to eat steamboat, but didnt feel at all happy when she at 1st said we go for steamboat.. i just followed when they went.. but in the end settled down at the thai and chinese restuarant.. said 'same (一样)' when she asked what i wanna eat.. then she ordered my tom yum soup with rice.. after that, not a single word came out of my mouth until just now.. a simple 'ok' when she asked me to go bathe.. haha
suddenly i'm so afraid of living.. especially when i feel the pains inside my body.. heart, head, stomach, knees, back, foot, and the cramps on my legs.. i just dont know why we're strangling to live, prevent ourselves from dying, but we still do will die eventually right? i dont want to live knowing that one day i will die of whatever illness, so i dont want to have a checkup.. blah blah, just being pessimistic and random.. i think i will not when school reopens.. but well, there is exactly 1 more month to go.. i have 1 more month to be pessimistic.. haha please pardon me.. =))
why am i feeling this way? recently, i thought things are going on fine.. but little did i expected that in the end, they are all my one sided wishful thinking.. nothing has changed for the better, and instead, they are turning worse.. maybe they are fated to be good for me for just a while.. just when i thought that i have back my motivations in life or whatever things, the next very moment, they disappeared into the thin air..
and oh, it is jeffrey aka jie fu's birthday.. happy birthday, jie fu! all the best in everything wor.. i sent you a message, dont know you received it anot.. anyway, 生日快乐!! enjoy your day.. =))
